I noticed a handsome young guy walked toward me, and I could tell he had just gotten off work. Nothing he does annoys me, and believe me, I have quite a few pet peeves. Could I be a cougar if I unintentionally picked him up? Would his family think he was crazy for dating an older woman?
Here are the reasons you wave off the idea of dating young: (aimless, noncommittal, out just for sex). But it didn’t seem to fit my reasons for dating younger, nor is it an accurate or flattering explanation of why younger men are worth dating.
But that’s not a power position, and it does you no favors. Beware of wielding stereotypes; they’re cheap shortcuts masquerading as wisdom, and if you use them, prepare to be judged by them. You would only applaud someone if she succeeded in doing something impossible or crazy, or if she got away with something she shouldn’t have. The cougar image is cartoonish at best, derived either from a culture fearful of a sexually empowered woman, or from the woman herself, who claims cougardom as a way to boost her self esteem via sex with a man many years her junior.
You don’t need to make like Stifler’s mom and prey on young 18-year-old boys. What you need to do is embrace the incredible sexual power you possess—and stop making excuses for why you can’t. If there’s one complaint I hear from younger men—and the reason they’re interested in older women, is that they’re a little tired of the same old scene and games.
They’re very into the idea of spending time with a woman who brings a little more to the table—a whole world of experience and interests outside of his own. He’s smarter than you think and would welcome a grown-up conversation, not to mention a mature relationship.
A lot of women I know prefer to date older men — and, hey, I get that.
An older man can make you feel protected, taken care of, young, and sexy.
But then I met Ben (name has been changed to protect the overly sensitive).
Ben changed my views on younger guys — because, really, the operative word is This might be selfish — actually, it is 100 percent selfish —but it's true.
You use it as a reason to blow them off, pare back your options, and fuel embittered stories about how It’s So Hard to Meet Good Men. One of my most popular posts to date is 7 Reasons Why You Should Want to Date an Older Woman. ” followed by a high five, which is kind of odd when you think about it. As I approached my mid 30s, I wondered if this meant I was now a bona fide cougar. The term conjures an image of a hungry, embattled woman with heavily coiffed hair, mummified in makeup, squeezed into a bedazzled top and looking to “score” a young man.
The problem is, you think that person has to be older than you. Just as chronological age doesn’t always “cure” one of immaturity, a man can be all of these things and still be 24, 28, 30 (depending on what you consider young). You’ve told yourself you don’t really want a younger man. Regardless of how sexually permissive and progressive we think we are, there’s still a bit of eyebrow raising when a woman dates younger. And when I tell people that (if they ask or if it comes up), I either get a lilting “Reaalllly” or a “You go girl!
But what might the real benefits of dating someone younger be?